All i want for....

BIRTHDAY...













 A GIFT from heaven...




XMAS ????

















Also a GIFT from heaven.....



NEW YEAR???

GIFT from heaven as well...

So, dear God, plz hear me this year.... Plz send me the gift from heaven soon..... Send all my love to You....

Luv u,
XOXO
ayumi

It's my Birthday...Soon..^^

Yippee!!! it's my birthday soon, probably in 2 weeks time.... Actually i'm a bit sad since i wasn't at home celebrating my b'day..last birthday i have, we're eating out at restaurant... the past b''day too, either it's a BBQ party or anything else.... it's x as beautiful as it sounds, but of course it is the best if we're celebrating it with the family members. But this is the 2nd time i'm celebrating it away frm home... last time was in matrix, around 4 yrs ago,,, with my roomies and my neighbors...
there are also a celebrating last yr,,bt it ws ahead of my birthday,, n i am x dat surprise la,,since i can smell it beforehand... this yr,, i'm x sure if there will be celebration wif my fellow frineds,,since we all been very busy n we are a bit short of money.... eotekhae? bt if they were going to celebrate, then i;m going to be very thankful la,,, if x,, it's ok,,, i''m x expecting much anyway.... (poor me)...x to say anything, bt as far as i remember, only 1 of them ever give me b'day gift...thnx a lot peeps....but anyway, ,the rest of them have been good to me for the past 3 yrs we have been friends and it is more than enough,,, u gals r my bestest frined in the world, u know.... don't forget and ignore me when we're done studying in the future.... =)

Review 4 dis week

first of all, after going to the class and been through the whole week, i think taking green neighborhood thesis is not dat bad,,,, I hv to bear with the lecturer though, but it still better be done in order for me to retrieve a gud research topic, retrieve my shame towards the things that happen during my internship, etc.
FYI, my thesis topic is officially on Backlanes.... yup, a very controversial 1, since it is going to be "DO WE REALLY NEED BACKLANES?" I really have to work my hardest to convince the board of planners to accept my title, and also to convince the planner outside UTM on my thesis outcome in the latter part.... but the challenge probably could help a lot in earning points for gud grades in thesis, if by GOD's will.

                              *                                                *                                                              *

I saw a weird post in the FB, someone is whining abt x having someone to turn to when is needing it.... whatever it is,, i do feel bad for dat person, coz i let out all my anger and stress and worries toward dat person, and dat person have nobody to tell abt it..... it's' own stress adding up with all my complaints, probably could make dat people aging faster than previously,,,,hahhaa,,,, I only can say: "Gud Luck.."

the rest of my life for this week is quite busy, since the convo, i still hv to catch up with the studio, and get my transport assignment done.... i even caught a flu + sore throat..now i started to lose my voice, bt dis is due to the 3 hr karox session in addition of the sore throat la.... hopefully i can recover over the weekend....

xoxo =P

Dream High???

Should i say this or not??? Cause i didn't even DARE to DREAM anymore..... =(

Every time i wanted a thing the most in my life,, i never get it..... I don't even know who to blame..is it my destiny who always turn the things way around, or because i never deserve it or because i never fight for it with my whole life.... Maybe i just like being play safe all the time.... because i am x smart enough...

For this whole year,, there are too many incident that makes me relize that,,,, the Korea GOP program, the Indonesia GOP program, the last convo singing competition, and just recently, theTHESIS field of study....

Anyone who is taking the green Neighborhood option with Dr. Rafee must do the thesis with him, with his selected topic... if x, i also x know the consequences, but it is a bit hard for me to fight because i also didn't know what hold my future..... Just hoping that this thing would work out well and i quit listening to others....

ALL DA BEST, dear AiMe.....

Again... Neo ra go...

I have an FB chat with him 2 days ago, & dat makes me feels good abt it... I was like feeling release of all my concious & my maddness over him. Ever since then, i really feel release & gud,, probably if i decide to get over him after this, it won''t be that hard.... PLus, i didn't even have a severe heartbeating compare to the moment with the Viet guy, or the other guy that i like.... Whatever la~
Ok,,,, i feel gud,, i feel fine & jz sleepy, i try to train myself to not sleeping in the evening, bt instead, i still wasting my time on the internet.... should've done something better right? SO, i got to go now,, I need to plan the days ahead me.....

Get it over

I HATE U!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is all i want to say everytime i saw him in my FB and when he become offline for chat.... i just trying to forget him, but dat''s hard...i don't even feel a thing when i saw my crush yesterday, because of him... i lose all my senses.... stupid AMY.... Let's get over him soon, okay?

From today onwards, i would like to declare that i will live my own life,,, n not disturbing others...I really feels like a fool,, trying to get ___ attention once in a while n get totally ignored,,,, Stupid cat.... it is worst than the time when i was fooling around with the Vietnamese guy... at least i know my position back then,,, this time it is totally out of control,,, silly girl... WTH am i thinking abt??? Don't it seem hurting myself by doing this? It's really hurt, you know????? Do u really know abt it? All this while i really thought that we all can keep a healthy relationship, even if what i want doesn't work out, but what have u done? I cant believe i was fooled by the sight of you just a month ago,,, and i actually taking your words seriously... hahaaha.... what a fool.... I don't know what to think anymore,,, Whether to think it positively, like, ,you are interpreting my reaction on the last in the wrong way,, like i was so happy to leave you behind....  or the fact that it was over the moment we all stepping out off the place..

The memories i had was like a fiction,,, 2 months with so many stories to tell, and the ending is just like that,,, if i sell the stories, the people who read it will be very upset with the ending.... And me, have to start from scrap again,,, Deleting all the things i have written and starting to write a new story again,,just like 1 year ago, during the summer too... But that was a bit fun,,, i experience many things within 10days,,, and i get a souvenir, friendship, hatred, jealousy, loss of frens,, what else, i got it all in 10 days.... but nothing is as painful as this time.... it's only creating a scandal and big news, but it's not fun at all... OK... stop it... You are getting ignore anyway....  Padan muka kamu,, who ask you to be a minta puji type of girl,, everywhere u go u minta puji,,, now u loss one of ur source of minta puji, u hurt urself... Now only can minta puji with colleague at Station 1,, even then, they are going to be bored with u sooner or later... especially the matured ones, the 'dongsaeng', probably xla,,since they are cute little 'dongsaeng'.... bla..bla...bla... 

( While write this, i listening to 丁当-我爱他）

 P/S：我不爱他，只喜欢他。。。 

Nowadays, i spend most of my time cuci mata with the customers at my workplace,,, dat''s a fun thing to do...hehehe.... Only now i realize there are many handsome guys in kuching.. i know there are lots of pretty girls, but not handsome guy.... Working there make me see alll the hotties in Kuching... And yesterday,, a cute guy keep looking at me like once in a few minutes, how cute... but i am not too sure myself, is he looking because i am cute or because i look pathetic...hahahha.... anyway, last week i saw my brother in law (kkkk.....), U-kiss (ex-member) Kibum lookalike,,,, seriously,,, very handsome and with the height of 180++cm,,, Kibum usually doesn't look dat handsome when he is standing with his fellow members, or when he is standing next to his older brother,,, but seeing someone looks like him really make me think that he is actually very good looking in real life.... And this is x the first time i saw his lookalike,,, last time a saw a real korean in KL, looking like him in Monorail station... this time, he is probably a Malay or chinese la, i'm x too sure myself.... 

My other activities is fooling around with my colleague there... It's quite fun.... It really helps in keeping the tension away,,, well, working anywhere can cause tension.....